Summary: Irina meets a contact at night in a punk bar.
Rating: Hard R
Disclaimer: Characters don’t belong to me… just trying stuff with them…
Betareader: Margareta (Thanks so much!)
Author’s Note: This story was previously published on the internet under my pseudonym ‘Akasha’.
Until then, please excuse the many flaws, and rest assured, I know better now. ;) (Or at least I hope so.)
“Looking for someone special?“
The deep voice was close to her ear. Irina smiled faintly, but didn’t turn around. She drank the last remains of her drink slowly, feeling his hot breath tickling the sensitive skin under her ear. Then she put the glass down and moved her body slightly. Her back brushed the body of the man behind her.
“Yes.” She replied in her deep, sultry voice, tilting her head seductively to look at him.
He chuckled close to her face while his eyes scanned every single detail of her expression, finally coming to rest on her red, moist lips. He leaned in closer, his arm resting on the counter next to her.
“Tell me what you are looking for…” he demanded hoarsely while his eyes wandered from her mouth back to her dark eyes. “And why you are here, in a place like this.”
For a moment Irina looked around in the dark nightclub. It was a club for punk and rock, the visitors dressed mainly in leather. The dancing floor was occupied with couples that were dancing, kissing or doing stuff beyond kissing. Irina didn’t doubt that more than half of them were totally stoned. The dim red light made it hard to see more than shapes in the distance.
“Why am I here?” she repeated the question. Her hand touched his cheek, then ran over his chin and neck. “I’m here to meet someone.”
“Really? Well, aren’t we all?” He took another sip of his drink, then he offered her the glass. Without losing his eyes, she took it and drank before she handed it back to him.
“Strong…” she commented at the liquid.
“Too strong for you?” he teased, his mouth just inches away from the skin of her cheek. His hot breath on her skin, mixed with his manly scent seemed to intoxicate all of her senses. His dark outfit made him almost irresistible to her.
“No…,” was her husky reply. “I was just not prepared. You don’t look as if you consume strong drinks like that.”
“I’m full of surprises…” he promised while his eyes went down her body. Her tight leather dress didn’t hide her perfectly shaped form. His hand touched the smooth, silky skin of her bare leg. Her eyes didn’t loose his, when he now let his hand move further upwards.
“That’s not what I came for,” she murmured sultrily and his eyes got a dangerous gleam. He pulled her roughly against his body, her legs at either side of him. His lips were still not touching her in any way.
“Then what did you come for?” he asked.
“Information,” she replied.
She shivered when his hands moved to the small of her back and pushed her against his abdomen.
“I could give you information. On whatever you need…” His fingers played at the black cloth she was wearing around her upper arm.
Irina tilted her head, her eyes challenging. “Could you?” she asked and took his glass again. The liquid burned in her throat and the high-percent alcohol seemed to have its effects now – or was it his closeness, that made her feel dizzy and light-headed?
He moved softly against her, eliciting a soft moan from her lips. When she noticed how much he turned her on, she bit her lips and tried to focus on what she had come for.
“Oh yes,” he whispered back, holding her body in place when she tried to bring a little more distance between them to be able to concentrate.
“Good.” Irina’s eyes drowned in his. “What do you know about Krutshov?”
He smiled and shook his head slightly. “I know a lot about him, but nobody said I would give you anything without a little cooperation on your part.”
“Cooperation?” Her voice was trembling from need when his hands cupped her ass now.
“Are you afraid?” he asked and she closed the distance between their lips. Her tongue flicked out to tease the corner of his mouth, then she bit his lower lip.
“I am never afraid.” She hissed back, her tongue soothing the arching spot on his lip. “I just don’t have time for one of your games.”
“I thought you loved games. Well, if you’re not interested, I’m sorry you had to come the long way for nothing,” he murmured, his fingers running over her naked shoulder. His eyes locked deeply with hers, then he suddenly turned around, about to leave the place.
Irina stared after him, then she jumped up from her chair and rushed after him. She caught up with him near the exit, grabbed his arm and pushed him against a wall.
“You son of a b****, I did not come the whole way for nothing.” She emphasized dangerously calm.
It didn’t take him much of an effort to free from her grip and press her against the cool stone wall. She gasped in shock when she felt the pain rush through her arm.
“You said you are never afraid,” his voice was soft against her ear. “Prove it. I arranged for a private room upstairs. Follow me.”
“Who guarantees that you’re not going to kill me?”
“Nobody,” he whispered back. “But I assure you, I have much more pleasurable things in mind than killing you…. for now at least.”
His hand wandered over her ass. She pressed her body against the cool wall, trying to support herself with her free hand. The heat rushed through her body with overwhelming power.
“What’s your answer? Your cooperation for information.”
“Yes…” she finally agreed. “Agreed.”
He turned her around and only now she became aware of how much her arm hurt. But before she was able to react to that pain, his lips crashed on hers, devouring, sucking and teasing, until she was leaning against the wall, her breath coming in short pants.
“Come,” he demanded and grabbed her arm roughly. He dragged her along the wall, and in the corner of the large dancing room through a dark curtain. Irina gasped when she stumbled in the darkness of the hallway they were now crossing, and fell against the man. He turned, pressed her against the closest wall and sank his lips to her neck.
Irina laid her head back against the wall, catching her breath for a moment at the heat that seemed to turn her blood into lava.
“Do you like that?” he asked and she nodded, unaware of the darkness and that he couldn’t see her move. “I asked you a question.” His voice was rough, yet, his touch was soft and warm, his arms resting on her waist.
“Yes…” Her voice was trembling with desire. A loud moan escaped her throat when he bit her skin. She lifted her arms to his broad shoulders, her hands clenching into the material of his shirt.
He pressed himself into her, lifting one of her legs to his waist. He thrusted into her, causing her to whimper in desire. She bent her head to his ear, her breath coming out shallow when her tongue darted out to tease his salty skin.
All of a sudden he broke contact, leaving her staggering in the darkness before he pulled her through another curtain and up a small staircase.
When he had pulled her into a small room, he locked the door and pulled the key out of the keyhole. Irina watched him, her eyes showing desire, but also insecurity and nervousness.
“I don’t like being locked,” she stated coldly and he laughed.
“I know…” was his only comment. He stepped slowly towards her, his eyes never leaving her body.
When he was only inches away from her, she stepped back intuitively, unable to read what he was about to do, since his eyes didn’t show any emotion. He saw her movement and grabbed her. Impatiently, he pulled her close to his body until his lips brushed hers. He held her arms firmly and although she was strong, she couldn’t get free.
“Are you afraid now?” he asked and Irina chuckled in an attempt of irony, but failed. He looked deeply into her eyes and could clearly see her nervousness reflected in them, but also her desire. His gaze softened for a moment and for a split second his expression was tender, as it had been years ago – all those years ago. He sighed. It almost seemed like a bad dream now, something that had lost all meaning and yet left him marked. And she was the cause for all his pain.
He pushed her roughly to the bed. She cried out in shock when she lost her balance and suddenly felt the mattress under her body.
His body covered hers immediately, not allowing her enough time to recover from her shock or think about a defense. Immediately his lips claimed the soft skin of her cleavage, trailing a hot path along the line of her leather dress. His touch was soft and sweet for a moment, then he looked up to scan her face.
Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes clouded with desire. Her hands lifted to his face, framing it tenderly, when he suddenly grabbed her wrists harshly and pinned them roughly to the mattress. Irina gasped for air but held his eyes.
“B****… I could kill you now…” he hissed and for a split second her heart started to beat faster at the realization that he was right. She was trapped. “Kill you for everything you have done to me.”
The grip around her wrists became tighter while his eyes roamed over her body. Then he lowered his mouth to her ear.
“I could kill you for running away… lying to me and betraying me.” His tongue trailed over the sensitive spot under her ear and she shivered against his body.
“And I couldn’t blame you for doing so…” she breathed into his ear which caused him to mark her with his teeth. She moaned in a mixture of pleasure and pain.
“How generous of you, allowing me to kill you…” he said ironically, then his lips sank down to hers, devouring her mouth in a deep kiss until she turned her head away to gasp for air in a lack of oxygen. He urged her further onto the bed and only when her hands hit cool leather, she noticed the chains at the bed.
She tried to free her hands from his, but his grip was strong and his body pinned her firmly in place.
“Don’t…” she pleaded and his eyes rested on her for a short moment, before he tied one of her wrists with the leather stripe to the bed. Her breath quickened and he noticed that she was close to panicking. His lips brushed over hers softly, then started to nibble seductively.
“I promise, you’ll like this…” he whispered, his hot breath tickling her oversensitive skin.
“I don’t like this…” she snapped back, tearing at the chain that held her wrist to the bed. She tried to free herself with her other hand, but he prevented her from doing so by holding her arm firmly in place.
“You love games… let’s play one of mine for a change…. Do you like this?” His hand cupped her breast through her dress and started to tease her nipple. Her body reacted immediately to his touch and soon he replaced his hand by his mouth. Even through the material she could feel his touch hot against her skin. She sobbed and laid her head back. Her free hand tangled into his hair, her breath coming in shudders.
Finally he lifted his head and took her hand. He turned his face and his lips closed over her pulse point. She was so lost in his caress that she didn’t notice that he moved her hand up.
Suddenly she found her second hand tied as well. Irina pulled at the shackles in shock, testing them, and cried out frustrated when she couldn’t get free, followed by some curses in Russian.
“Now, just to be sure, you won’t run away again,” he murmured at her ear.
“I promise you to not run away… I need the information, so why should I…” she started but he hushed her with his hand which he laid to her lips.
“And this time I want to be the one who is in control of the situation. I don’t want to feel as if I was just part of one of your stupid games.” He hissed and didn’t hide the fury from his voice.
He started to unbutton her dress impatiently. She fought against him, her eyes locked with his combatively, but finally he succeeded. He pushed the material down her body and tossed in aside, admiring her white underwear and how contrastive it was compared to her black leather outfit. She couldn’t deny that his game turned her on.
“Stylish…” he said, not hiding his amusement. Then he leaned his body over hers. His hands ran tenderly across the length of her arms. “Now, what is this? Playing the innocent? Another one of your facades, or real?”
His hands continued their path over her shoulders and downwards until they were lying at her breasts, forming them out with his hands slowly. He unfastened her bra with a quick move and before she realized what had happened, his lips sucked in one of her nipples, while his arms supported her, lifting her body against him.
“Ohgod…” She closed her eyes, her hands clenched to fists. She arched her body against him. He pushed his leg between hers, lifting her body a little. Her moan died in his mouth when he connected his lips with hers, his leg pressing into her core. He felt her thrust against him and moaned against her lips. Then he suddenly retired breathlessly. His lips trailed a path down her body, they took their time caressing her belly, then went further downwards.
He pulled her panties down with the way his lips went. Ever so slowly he removed them. His own shirt followed before his lips sank back to her legs. He caressed every spot with tormenting slowness, ignoring her attempts to urge him on.
He teased and bit, soothed her oversensitive skin with his tongue and caressed her until she was writhing under him and her breath came in small pants and moans, mixed with pleas in Russian and English.
Finally his lips touched her center lightly. She moved against him and he pulled back instantly.
“Don’t move, or I’ll stop immediately.” He demanded. Irina whimpered and tried to regain control. But at his next touch she was lost again. She fought the urge to thrust against him, determined to not let him touch her. This was one of their games – who was the one to give up first and she would definitely not be the one. She had never been. This was her game…
His tongue teased her clit relentlessly, at first very softly, then soon getting more insistent. Not even realizing it, she had started to whimper and closed her eyes. He was her weakness… he was the only man who could defeat her.
When he used his tongue to part her swollen folds, she let out a sharp cry, all her will and control shattered. He possessed her, not only her body, but also her soul, and there was nothing she could do about it.
Unable to control herself any longer, she lifted her knees and wrapped them around his shoulders, finally giving in to the need to move against him.
He pulled back immediately and she whimpered, her whole body trembling and begging for release. His hands roamed unhurriedly over her abdomen and up her belly, then back down the side of her body. It was hard for him to remain controlled and not just f*ck her until their need was sated, but tonight he needed to be in control over her.
“Remember the rule…” he warned. “You do not move.”
She was trembling against his touch, unable to speak.
His tongue resumed the almost unbearable caresses. His hands played at her leg, tickling the skin in the back of her knee. Irina felt the world spinning. Her moans got louder, mixed with pleas and words of encouragement, spoken in a nonsense mixture of Russian and English.
Finally his tongued flicked out, entering her soft wetness. His teases were thorough and relentless, driving her closer and closer to the point where she didn’t even knew where she was anymore. All her control broke. She tried desperately to stop her body from thrusting against him – unsuccessfully, since she was far beyond the point of being able to control her actions.
When she bent against him, the air was filled by her passionate cries and her begging words not to stop. Her body shuddered wildly as a hard orgasm washed over her and made the world fade for some seconds.
He continued his caresses with tormenting slowness until she fell back onto the mattress, panting heavily. Her eyes were closed while he softly kissed his way up. God, how much he loved her – and hated her at the same time for loving her.
“Irina, look at me.” He demanded and her eyelids fluttered open, her breath coming fast and hot against his skin. “Now, tell me what you were looking for in this place.” He murmured against her lips.
“I was looking for you…” she replied and closed her eyes when she realized how true it was, not only for tonight. “And I don’t mean tonight… I was looking for you my whole life… Jack.”
“Breaking the rule by saying my name…” he teased her and she smiled weakly.
“You broke it first…”
”True”, he admitted silently, but didn’t say it out loud. He touched her cheek with his hand, his thumb wiping away a drop of sweat. He could feel her heart beating heavily and for a moment he wished that they could start over again – turn back time and forget about all the shadows that turned the brightness of their love into a deep darkness.
“Irina, I don’t understand you…” he suddenly started, shaking his head in disbelief. “You betrayed me more than once, you lied to me, stole the Rambaldi manuscript and those are only some of your crimes. You should know that I hate you and would do anything to seek revenge. Yet you came with me and followed me here, although you had to believe that I would kill you.” His lips nibbled at her cheek and she closed her eyes again, shivering at the sensation of his naked chest against her breasts. “Why did you do it? Is that information you are searching for worth the risk of being killed?”
“No…” she whispered. “No, it’s not.”
He looked into her eyes and shifted a little, his erection pressing into her thigh. “Then why?”
“Because I…,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “…I… trust you.”
He stared at her for a few seconds, then he shook his head totally stunned. Her revelation seemed so unreal that it was almost ridiculous. After all she had done to him, she trusted him. Either she was completely naive – which was unlikely – or this was another one of her games.
“You trust me.” He repeated and his hands ran over her throat. “Although I could kill you right now, and there is nothing you could do about it.”
“I love you, Jack. You’re the only person who was ever able to really touch me; during our marriage you treated me as if I was someone really special, you even made me forget about what I had come for from time to time. I admit, I’ve underestimated my feelings for you, for I thought that leaving you would be easy. I was wrong. You have always been the only person in the world that really meant something to me. So, if you’re the one who kills me, so be it. Go ahead… I won’t try to defend myself.” Her eyes filled with tears and for the first time she didn’t even try to stop them. She closed her eyes, her body shaking. The kiss that followed was unexpected for both of them. His mouth ravaged hers roughly, but with a deep tenderness at the same time – a kiss meant to punish her and heal their wounds at the same time, expressing both, hate and love.
He shifted a little, his erection grazing her clit, before he finally thrust into her. Both stilled at the sensation, their moans lost in the other’s mouth.
Her wet heat surrounded him and was almost enough to take him over the edge. She shifted to adjust to his size. His lips trailed a path over her cheek to her ear and bit her earlobe. God, how much he wanted to feel her arms around him, wanted to possess her soul, not only her body. His hands went to her wrists, his thumb running over the leather that held her arms in place.
“How do I know you’re telling the truth? That you won’t run away as soon as you get the chance to?”
“Because…” She turned her head, afraid to see his reaction to her words. “Because you chained me. And I don’t mean those…” She pulled at her shackles. “Maybe I will go away again, but never from you. I could never give up on you. I’ve tried for twenty years…”
At this revelation he reconnected their lips, slowly and tenderly, while he started to move inside her. His hands ran along the length of her arms and finally opened her shackles. When he took one hand to his lips and softly caressed the red marks, the leather had left, she wrapped her other arm around his body, and entangled her hand in his hair.
His thrusts became more insistent and he moaned against her skin. She pulled her knees to her body and wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him deeper into her.
She cried out when he bit her shoulder, marked her and then soothed away the pain. It took all of his strength to hold back for he wanted her to go with him, wanted not only their bodies to melt, but also their souls – maybe for the first time. No lies between them, no hidden truths or personalities.
“Let it go,” he demanded at her ear. “Come for me again.”
She laid her head back, her fingers burying in the skin of his back. “Faster… Jack, please…”
He complied, thrusting into her faster. Her head fell back and he buried his face at the crotch of her neck when her breathing quickened. He nibbled at her chin, his biting and licking being the exactly right mixture of pain and pleasure to make her loose control a second time. His hand reached between them and pinched her clit softly with his fingers.
“Ja-ck… ohgodohgod… JA-CK…”
When he felt the first spasms of her orgasm around his cock he followed her, their moans mingling with passionate cries and pants until they were both lying sated on the sheets, unable to move.
When his breathing had normalized and he felt that he could get up without staggering or get hit by dizziness, he lifted from her. Suddenly feeling cold from the loss of his warmth against her, she sat up as well.
He was standing at the window, staring into the dark night outside. Sadly she lowered her eyes to the ground, unable to think about something appropriate to say.
Suddenly he turned around and threw a file onto the bed. Irina looked at it. ‘Krutshov’ was written on it in dark letters. She didn’t look at him, but got up and started to get dressed.
Despite everything, their love seemed to have no chance to ever persuade the darkness. She felt her heart break and for a moment she wished, he had just killed her. There seemed to be nothing that would ever be able to save them. If love wasn’t strong enough, what could be?
She rearranged her appearance in front of a mirror, then turned around. Jack was looking at her, his feelings hidden behind a mask of control. She went to him and touched his face with her hand, her thumb softly tracing his lips, before being replaced by her lips in a deep kiss.
“We’ll be in touch?” she asked at his lips and he nodded.
“You know how to contact me when you need information.”
She nodded with a hint of sadness in her eyes. The bridge between their hearts seemed gone into unattainable distance. Irina turned around, the file pressed closely to her chest. She opened the door and looked into the hallway a short time, then she turned around and shut the door with a slam.
“Why does it have to be like this?” she asked and a small sob escaped her throat. Her eyes sparkled in fury.
He didn’t answer – he didn’t even know an answer.
“Jack… do you love me?”
He struggled with his answer and his voice could barely be heard when he finally said the truth out loud – the only truth that really mattered.
Her eyes filled with tears when she heard the word. “Do you love me enough to forgive me?” she then asked, afraid of the answer.
“I don’t know…” he replied and went to her, finally pulling her against his body. His face buried in her hair and he breathed in her scent.
“Do you think it can ever be again like it was all those years ago between us?”
He touched her cheeks, framed her face with his hands and kissed her softly. Both knew the answer to her question.
No, it would never be again like it had been years ago. The shadows of their past could never disappear, the hate between them never fully be persuaded since the hurt was too immense. This was all they could ever have. Love in the darkness, where they were both lonely and unable to find each other.
Irina turned around and broke contact. “I have to go…”
“We’ll be in contact.” Jack said lowly and Irina turned to face him at the door; the moonlight that shone through the window lighted his face in its pale white light. He was smiling at her for the first time after so long. Softly, she returned his smile.
“Yes, we’ll be.” She assured tenderly and for a last time their eyes met before she left the room and disappeared in the dark hallway.
The Darkness Of Love.
Their love had become impossible to be lighted by the bright light of the sun, but maybe someday there would be the moon lightening their bridge back to each other.
The Brightness of Hope.
“In this world so full of fear, full of rage and lies
I can see the truth so clear in your eyes,
So dry you eyes.
I’m so grateful to you
I’d have lived my whole life through
Lost forever, if I never knew you.”